How to make time for myself
I recently ran a poll on Instagram asking people which statements from a few options resonated with them. The one that got the most votes was " I find it hard to fit in time for you e.g. exercise, friends, relax time".
This didn't surprise me in one way because it's a sentiment expressed often by my one to one clients too. When you think about it properly though - it's shocking. We don't feel that we have TIME to focus on such critical things that are so essential to our own wellbeing - moving your body, connecting with friends, ANYTHING at all that makes you feel good which in turn allows us to be equipped to deal with day to day life..
And how annoying is it when people tell us to "just make time"? It feels almost insulting doesn't it? Like - what do you think I'm doing with my time? Were working, were running around after kids, we're keeping on top of the mundane house stuff etc etc. And when it comes to the end of the day - well we are exhausted and just want to flop.
Having said all of that - I want to share with you a video I watched that really changed my outlook on all this and reframed it for me. It's only 10 minutes long so do watch it (the link is at the bottom of the blog) . The essence of it is that "time is elastic and we cant make more time but time will stretch to accommodate what we choose to put into it". She explains (in a much better way than I can) that Its not that we don't have time to do things we sometimes claim not to have time for - it's just that those things are not a priority for us.
So from a practical perspective here is my 2 pence worth on the matter with some practical ideas. Let's use the example of "reading regularly" (you can replace with whatever it is that you struggle to find time for, whether that's exercise, connecting with friends, having a relaxing bath - whatever! )
You have to plan the time to yourself in, as if you would plan a work appointment. If you just wait until "you have time" it will never happen! So, sit down and think - when is a good time for me to read? you might think, "I've tried doing it in the evening but I'm too tired normally, ok, that's setting myself up to fail if I try that - what about lunchtime? Instead of scrolling aimlessly I could try reading then". Try starting with once a week - and up it from there. remember to set a reminder too.
Another example could be If you really want to catch up with friends more but you never get round to scheduling it in and then everyone is too busy - why not have a recurring meet up time e.g. 1st Friday of the month once a quarter? (or whatever frequency works for you). That way no one needs to organise it because it's already in the diary.
There is a whole load more to this we could talk about with regards to freeing up more time around setting up your life systems to run more effectively which include elements like delegating, making sure everything has a place and integrating planning habits into your life... all of which will help you to feel clearer and calmer AND gift you more time.
If you want help knowing where to start with exactly this, click here to book in for a chat with me to find out more about how I can help.
Link to “How to gain control of your free time” Ted talk
